How to Take Better Dirty Pictures
Or: Mikey’s Guide to Photographing Naked Babes. (or maybe just,"How to photograph nudes")


Me

Let me start by saying I am not a writer. Mandy is the literary talent here and I simply point and click my camera. What she creates with her beautiful mind, I create with my eyes (and shutter finger).
She offered her considerable editing skills to this article, but I thought it might be better for you to see me as I am, proof that you don’t have to be literate or even smart to take nice photos.
I see, I love, I click the shutter..

Over time I have learned a few things while clicking that shutter and I’m passing ‘em on here.
Let’s start with the essentials--

All women are beautiful

The Babe: It doesn’t matter what she looks like. All women are worth photographing partly or fully naked and it’s just a matter of concentrating on her best qualities. If she'll willing, do it... just like sex!

The Camera: I’m starting with the assumption that you are shooting with a digital camera. (Nikon just announced it’s discontinuing their film cameras). A photo is a photo…and the digital image is now.
You must have a camera that takes 4 or 5 million pixel photos (or more commonly called megapixels as in 5 megapixels). Even the newest automatic point-and-shoot cameras are 4 or more..so odds are you are fine.
If you are serious you will need a single lens reflex camera with changeable lenses and an add-on flash. These cameras cost between $800 and $2,000. (I shoot with a Canon D20 and with the extra battery, two lenses, a flash attachment and 2 gig memory card, It costs almost $5,000. There are four things you get with this set-up: 1: a flash to bounce off the ceiling, 2: a choice of “wide” or “long” lenses. 3: it shoots FAST and often, with no delay or pause between shots. (This is important when your model is rolling around like a cat in heat and you’re trying to capture the action), and 4: big file sizes allow you to crop into the photo later, improving the odds that you have a nice final photograph.(The big memory card helps here too, it stores big files and allows you to shoot hundreds of photos without having to stop shooting and download the pics from the camera).
Having said that, today’s point-and-shoots have zoom lenses for flexibility , shoot big files and have great built in light meters to take the worry out of exposure. The built-in flash is the biggest draw back...so see if you can find one that allows a flash to be added. If you shoot outdoors…there’s no real difference between them and a SLR.

Then there’s the old Polaroid.

So you have the girl and a camera, she has fixed her hair and put on makeup, now you're ready to get on with the nuts and bolts of taking photos.

Where to Shoot: Outdoors...Getting naked is easy in the country but gets more difficult in the suburbs and near impossible in the city (unless you are very adventuresome).
Try the back yard (with a high fence) It provides lots of light, no flash needed and if you keep her in the soft shadows with a plain background, the effect is pretty much like being in the studio with a simple no-seam paper background.


The soft light of a shady back yard works well. The plain wall could pass for the studio.

Indoors is the easier option. You have privacy and can shoot day or night. (You know she is probably more in the mood late at night). Make the surroundings comfortable with music and anything else that’ll feed the mood (dirty vids?). Some interiors give you a wealth of opportunities but more often than not, the bare apartment or hotel room hampers creativity and you have to either treat it as a plain background or be creative and use the space to make a statement. Make it more interesting by staying out of the bedroom. Consider the bath, kitchen and hallway as options, or maybe where you have your miniature trains set up.


These interiors vary widely, They don't always have to be "attractive" to make the photo work.
Go with what is available and let it guide you to tell a story.

But You Have to Light the Indoors: Don't be intimidated. There are only four ways to shoot indoors: 1: By daylight coming through the window. 2: Room light (letting the lamps and overhead bulbs do the job...the photos usually come out soft and blurred, but the effect is often dramatic and artsy. It also softens the model and can be quite flattering. 3: Direct in-camera flash. This is the only flash option with a point-and-shoot camera. The results usually look amateurish but can be used to make harsh revealing studies as well..never flattering to the model! 4: My fave: bouncing an adjustable flash unit off the ceiling. This creates a good overall light that imitates studio lighting and allows you to shoot fast with good exposures and captures any action without blurring. 90% of what I shoot is lit this way.

 
Daylight is dramatic, but limiting.

 
Direct in-camera flash is revealing and dramatic, but rarely flattering.


The room light on the left (in this case a near-by table lamp) is very different than the bounce-flash lighting on the right.
Each has it's time and place. Below is an examle of how to use bounce-flash.


The flash shoud be pointed at the ceiling, slightly behind you. The light bounces down with a well lit, flattering overall effect.

Ready, Set, Shoot:
Tell the model to look at the camera at all times (eye contact makes for a better photo, trust me).This is the time to try expressions...tell her, “smile”, “pout”, “be mean”, or simply, “be natural, no expression”..
discover what works best and stay with that.


With each of these models I found their best expression early and stayed with it for the entire session.

Shoot wide...take two steps closer, shoot some more, then get even closer, shoot some more (at this point look for the best details of her body and face, while avoiding the less attractive parts..scars..wrinkles..pimples..bad teeth...every woman is different and what is good for one body ain’t for another). This is the time to find her best qualities and focus on them. Finally, get up close to the nitty gritty....or as they say in the porn world, "the money shot".

Seem complicated? Not at all. You just have to concentrate on a few things… talk to her, remind her to look at the camera, tell her often that she looks GREAT, (yes, that old cliché of a photographer saying. “yes, yes, baby… great, great, show it to me...beautiful”, works!. Say it!). Keep moving side to side, closer and closer...That’s it!

If she doesn’t seem to know what to do, give her a prop; cigarettes are a fave. Sex toys might make her feel awkward, common everyday items can make her more comfortable and be used to create a narative.

Having her go through a change of clothing is a two edged sword. On one hand you get variety (especially if you can’t change the environment), but changing clothes takes time, can kill the mood, and if she gets pre-occupied with her wardrobe, she might loose interest altogether. I recommend you start with her dressed and have her take things off slowly. She can get used to you taking her picture, you can feel her out (that’s feel her out not up), Do all this in the wide shots…as you get warmed up and move in closer, you don’t want her fussing with getting undressed. When it is starting to feel right, get those clothes off. But I shouldn’t have to tell you that! Leaving one small piece of clothing is good for adding interest, so the shoes, stockings or a few pieces of jewelry can stay.

Edit and Fix: If you want to do great conversions of your photos to black and white or sepia, clean up pimples and unsightly blemishes, and correct exposure errors, you need to use Photoshop or the software program that comes with your camera. You don’t need to be an expert, but will need to manage final file sizes for the internet as well as preparing galleries for web publishing. I’ll show ya a few examples of my alterations after taking pics out of the camera, but if you want to get really good at it, you’ll need a book or a class. (This is a good time to remind you to copy ALL the photos before you make the cuts. Save 'em...you may want to go back and look again long after you've edited).


Top left: The original photo of  Bridget the Midget, taken in her back yard against the garage in daylight. Top right: Lightened and converted to black and white. Bottom left: Altered in photoshop with a filter. Bottom right: My final version, cropped and altered in photoshop. This is the beauty of digital photography. I managed to take a fairly ordinary photo and (I think) make it special.

I hope these notes along with the examples pulled from my photos at MikeyandMandy.com will make it easier (and more fun) for you to get great dirty photos from your models-lovers-hookers-adventuresome friends. In the end the actual picture taking techniques you use will be up to you…you could probably teach me some things.

Ten Tips for Photographing Women:

1: Concentrate. Good photos don’t happen by casually snapping away...pay attention to every detail as you shoot.

2: Shoot a lot. Remember, the photos are free, now that digital has replaced film. You may find it weird to throw out 9 out of 10 photos, but even the best pros only use one out of ten shots. In the end, no one needs to know what it took to get to those 15 great photos.

3: Be prepared to lead or be lead by your model. A shoot can go either way and you have decide early on. A tough call…you have to see if she can take direction from you or just go wild, while you try to keep up and capture the action. Just like sex.

4: NEVER show her the photos as you shoot…NEVER. Show her the first test shot maybe..(she may insist)..but after that it’s like letting her look in the mirror…and she’ll get very uptight.YOU have to be in control of the photoshoot.

5: Don’t confuse the photoshoot with sex. Be professional, leave your clothes on, don’t touch without asking. If it’s your girlfriend or wife, save the sex for after…you’ll be plenty hot.

6: Be flexible under changing circumstances. You may start with one idea, but as you start shooting, things can take on a life of their own…go with the flow.

7: Shoot fast…don’t stop for long. If’s she’s getting into it, you don’t want to break the mood.

8: Review the photos calmly in the light of day…(the next day). You’ll be more objective after a few hours. After you’ve edited and found the best ones, make a few nice prints for your model.

9: Cover your ass. Be sure you have a signed photo release. Don’t have one?…Google “photo releases” and print one. Be sure you record the age of your model, and have a copy of two forms of I.D. showing her age. Take a photo of her holding the I.D. next to her face, br sure you can read the birthdate and name.Be sure she signs the release before she leaves the studio ( house, location, whatever). If you have to get one later in the mail, it may never happen, and you will NOT have the rights to use those photos, regardless of any verbal agreement. Yes, this includes your wife or best friend!

10: Study other photographers. Start with mine. Look at the galleries found on MikeyandMandy and you can see a pattern, the above notes will become obvious. Don't like my photos?...look hard at someone else's work, ( Bob Coulter, for instance) and see if you can spot a consistant, useable approach to apply to you work.

BONUS Tip: Keep it fun!

Want to see 100 of my favorite photos?...Click Here!

Michael C Gross (aka: Mikey) Contact Me Here

PS: See my article, "How to start your own pay site"

Michael C Gross is an award winning art director: National Lampoon, Esquire, Heavy Metal, as well a free lance designer for The Rolling Stones, John Lennon, The Muppets, and the Mexican Olympics (1968).
He has his art and design displayed in 5 museums around the world.
He was a film producer for 15 years producing such movies as: Heavy Metal, Ghostbusters (1and 2) Twins, Dave and six others as well as three TV shows. He has 4 Emmy nominations.
His photography is published world wide and his personal site has examples of his art, design and photography.

AND...Mikey has a blog: MikeytheMonkey His writing partner, Roberta Morgan has a blog: Mandy's Sex Life

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